Scarred
by Tomoshibi-Chan
Summary: He didn't want to be the one to fall apart but his best friend was broken and in a moment of clarity he realized he had no idea how to fix him, if he even can. [Poliet] [Human names used]


I was up till like 5am this morning writing this (OTL I have no life). But I'm making up for the time away from so heres another Hetalia oneshot! :) This is a little angsty poliet story that takes place after the comic strip "While You've Been Gone'. If you havent read it then just be aware there will be spoilers :) *sigh* I tried to keep them both in character but I would like to think that they dont just have one mood setting so I hope I did okay UwU Let me know how I did and If you guys want me to leave it where it is or if you guys want me to continue. :)

If I owned Hetalia why would I be on Fanfiction writing about my own series? No I don't own Hetalia.

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Feliks listened with little interest as Toris spoke of his day, rough patches with work and some close but thankfully non confrontational moments with Ivan. As much as he wanted to listen to his friend, worries from last night seemed to weave its way into his self conscious making it hard, nearly impossible, to focus. He wanted to bring up the subject with Toris however he wasn't sure if he even could if he wanted to. As fearless and totally fabulous as the Polish man was, he still had subjects he would cower from, this being one of them. "Po? Are you even listening?" Feliks snapped his head up to see Toris looking at him, his face a rare mix of annoyance and concern. It was funny to Feliks, that the only person who seemed to make Toris have noticeable irritation was him, it was a feat that was both amusing and impressive to say the least. Feliks flashed Toris a grin, waving him off with a hand of neatly manicured nails. "I'm like, listening Liet. Don't get your panties in a bunch." A look of confusion made Feliks giggle, And a small smile graced the Lithuanian's lips.

"But I don't wear panties Feliks, only you do that." Now it was Feliks' turn to roll his eyes, as he held in a laugh.

"It was a saying Liet. Have you like, lived under a rock? Besides, their totally comfortable!" If Toris responded Feliks must have missed it. His focus was on Toris, who turned around to face Feliks with his back against one of the couch arms. He couldn't believe that after so long, his best friend was back. "I cant believe your like, here Liet. I have SO many games we can play! Oh and I know some great shopping malls and-" Toris gave a downward cast causing Feliks to stop mid list to look at his friend with a frown. "What's wrong don't you like games anymore?" The prospect of this was disappointing and Feliks realized that since they weren't kids anymore, Toris' hobbies might have changed.

"I do want to hang out Po im just tired from today." Toris murmured quietly, leaning back to rest against the arm of the couch but flinching at the contact with his back. Feliks cringed, looking away as the yesterdays memory floated to the surface. His thoughts were interrupted when a hand hesitantly reached out and grasped his shoulder. Feliks gasped but was relieved to see it was only Toris, who was looking at his friend with a look of curiosity and concern. "Hey are you okay?" Feliks snorted

"Yeah im just tired. I totally spent all today cleaning Liet. It was like, gross but I wanted it to look nice when you got here!" The worry vanished from the Lithuanians face replaced by a look of relief and Feliks noted the victory of the small smile that developed on his friends face. Feliks was glad of this since he liked Toris' face better when he was happy, it seemed to light up the room a bit more.

"You didn't have to do that Po, I just like being here" For once Feliks couldn't help but agree. He was both surprised and relieved to have his friend back in his house again, back safely he added bitterly.

"No like,you should totally be grateful I did it otherwise there wouldn't be any plates or cutlery." Toris laughed in response, his face alight with amusement. Feliks' eyes glanced up to his childhood friend and paused, images from last night flashing through his brain. He looks so happy right now, how could-

"Po?" Feliks' snapped his head up to see Toris looking down at him, his once happy features now twisted into concern. Feliks hated that look, his friend looked so empty and haunted. " Po are you feeling okay?" The silence was painful and Feliks wanted nothing more then to go back to how it was before, back when Toris laughed and smiled like that every day, before the end of the commonwealth, before Ivan. His mouth felt dry and his throat felt closed off, his stomach twisting and turning as the thought of last night making him suddenly feel the need to vomit. Now was a perfect time to bring it up, and he knew he should it was the best opportunity, However as he opened his mouth to speak he closed it again and nodded his head instead. He couldn't do it. It looked like Toris wanted to say something however the moment passed in silence between them both.

"What's wrong Feliks." His voice was calm although Feliks could hear the worry in his tone. He never spoke of him by his human name, it felt weird, yet perfect from his lips. "Are you sick?" Feliks shook his head although it felt dizzying to do so. Sucking in a deep breath he looked up to the Lithuanian and gave him the best smile he could at the moment, muster.

"I'm, like, totally fine Liet. I just need some water, that's all. Don't worry so much all the time." He looked up, hoping his words were believable even though he wasn't sure he was okay although the prospect of water sounded all right. Toris' expression was unsure and Feliks looked away, cringing at the lie that realized had tumbled out of his mouth moments ago. No he was not okay, he needed to tell Toris. The quiet was broken as an audible sigh came from his friends lips as he stood up. Feliks' eyes jerked back up in surprise to see his friends disappearing form. Had he messed it up already?

"Where are you going?!" For a moment his accent was lost as concern made the Polish man reach up to grab onto the Lithuanians hand, making his companion look down so their eyes met. The haunted look was still there.

"I'm getting you water, Feliks." He answered plainly, his tone was polite yet somewhat distant. Feliks hated distance, especially from Liet.

"What do you mean, its like, my house I should be bringing you things." Feliks gripped onto his friends wrist tighter. He hated how weird Toris was acting. Since leaving Ivan's house he's been different, yes Toris has always been polite but this inferiority was sickening. Toris was anything but and the thought alone made Feliks want to both scream and cry.

"Feliks..."

"Don't!" Feliks' head snapped back up again to reattempt to meet his friends eyes. "Don't like, talk to me so formally Liet."

Feliks noted the way Toris flinched at his tone and for a moment he looked like he was going to say something, however he closed his mouth and looked down, in defeat. "I'm sorry" Toris murmured. It was sincere but the apology alone was like a punch in the gut.

"D-Don't do that either!" Feliks snapped, holding back the tears pricking at his eyes. Ivan did this to him. "Stop it! acting weird!" Feliks let out a shaky breath he was holding and looked up at his friend, a look of hurt on Toris' face matching his own. After a moment passed Toris broke the gaze and looked to the side, his eyes far away.

"Im sorry Po. I don't mean to be weird" Feliks' hurt turned to fury and he suddenly stood up, upturning the table with the tea pot and startling the Lithuanian in front of him. A sound of upset came out of Toris' mouth as he noticed the teapot falling onto the rug below them however Feliks didn't take notice or care to the rug. He was furious. At his Liet for not standing up for himself, at Ivan for doing what he's done to make Toris so strange, at the stupid war and the stupid capital they fought over. He hated them all for taking away his best friend from him.

"You aren't weird Liet! Your just acting like it! And I'm trying to help but Ivan has damaged you and as much as I'm trying I don't know what to do to fix it!" Toris opened his mouth in objection but Feliks interrupted before he could start. "No don't defend him he's hurt you Liet!" A look of fear flickered across Toris' face before it was gone again, replaced with that same look that Feliks hated. The hollow pained look on his best friends face.

"I know okay! I know!" His breath hitched and Feliks watched with a mix of horror and fascination as various emotions flitted across Toris' face. Some obvious while others were hard to identify. Toris was always so easy to read but now half of him was a mystery now and it was all because of Ivan. Feliks let go of his friends hand and in a moment of desperation, reached upward and wrapped his arms around Toris' underarms, resting his hands on his shoulder. He didn't want to be the one to fall apart but his best friend was broken and in a moment of clarity he realized he had no idea how to fix him if he even can. He clung to his best friends, head reaching up to hide in the crook of his neck as he tried to force the words out. "Yesterday I-" His voice cracked and for a moment he wasn't sure if he could continue. But Toris needed to know he didn't have to be alone in this. When he moved his head up to see his friends face looking down at him, he spoke again tone less desperate and now softer. "I saw them Liet." his voice was barely audible even in the quiet still room. He could see tears forming in Toris' eyes. At that moment they both knew the next words. "I saw your scars"


End file.
